“Masking Fatigue”: What Happens When You Can’t Keep Pretending You’re Okay
Author: Mokshvi Shah, BS Northeastern University Student
Published: September 2025
Masking is a survival strategy used by many neurodivergent individuals, particularly those with autism or ADHD, to navigate environments that do not accommodate their natural ways of thinking, sensing, or behaving. Masking may include mimicking facial expressions, suppressing stimming, scripting conversations, or overanalyzing social cues to fit in. While it can offer short-term protection from judgment or exclusion, long-term masking often results in what’s called "masking fatigue."
Masking fatigue is not just tiredness, it’s a deep psychological exhaustion. Many people report feeling disconnected from their identities, emotionally numb, chronically anxious, or even physically ill. Burnout, depression, and loss of self-awareness are common consequences. Over time, the effort to maintain the mask can become unsustainable, leading to social withdrawal or mental health crises.
People experiencing masking fatigue may find themselves thinking, “I don’t even know who I am anymore.” They might feel resentful of social obligations, experience heightened sensory sensitivity, or find it difficult to manage basic self-care. The disconnect between their internal reality and outward presentation creates a chronic state of cognitive and emotional dissonance.
Unmasking, allowing one’s authentic self to be seen, can be both freeing and terrifying. In environments where masking was once protective, unmasking might feel risky. This is why therapy plays such an important role. A neurodivergent-affirming therapist provides a nonjudgmental space to practice self-expression, challenge internalized ableism, and rebuild a sense of self that isn’t based on performance.
Support groups and online communities also offer validation and connection. Seeing others share the same struggles helps dismantle the isolation that masking often creates. From here, individuals can begin identifying their needs and limits more clearly. They might explore sensory regulation tools, reclaim stimming as a healthy outlet, and redefine what socializing looks like on their terms.
Healing from masking fatigue doesn’t mean abandoning social relationships, it means engaging in them in a way that honors authenticity. This shift can take time, courage, and support, but it opens the door to relationships rooted in mutual understanding rather than emotional labor. Unmasking is not about exposing yourself for others; it's about allowing yourself to exist, fully and safely, as you are.
